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Monday, December 19, 2011

TOPIK PERBUALAN HANGAT

so, today. topic perbualan hangat yang menjadi sebutan pelajar-pelajar PASUM khusunya ialah result final semester. what we expected is , the result will be released around 2 weeks after the breaks.  tapi serious lambat teramat sangat. even matrik pun dah 2 mggu lepas yang keluar. btw, result dah keluar. 

on my way time queue, menggigil kot. nak keluar kan matrik kad punya laa menggeletaa. nak tak nak, result dah tersedia depan mata. the choices are, nak tengok or taknak tengok. the 1st person yang tgk my result is Nad. and her 1st comment was, " waa bagus ! " . and i grab the result from her, and i was SHOCKED !

okay, alhamdulillah. syukur dengan apa yang ada. even bukan 4, tapi dah kira okay. cuma agak weird bila chemistry 2 yang study the day before boleh score. okay maybe rezeki. and i was so happy for those yang dapat 4 flat, especially IZA. she cries and she was like didnt believe that she got 4. good job IZA. 

**this the reason why i publish this post. taktahu kenapa malam ni macam so unstable mood. i really need to be realize that we are just FRIEND ! i cant force him to do want i want him to do. he has his own life. and sedar-sedar laa, dia hanya laa seorang manusia. dan seorang kawan. taktau ni dah kali ke barapa ratus ribu trying to get away from him. but it was like impossible. the more that i refused him, the more that i cant refuse him . ?
yea its true. dont know what the reason that make me cry of him, just now. it was like , oh God, im so weak. 


dengan rela membiarkan hati melayan segala perasaan yang sebelum ni banyak merobek hati. serious saya bodoh. dah tau what will happen next, or maybe right now, but im still adoring him sooo much. even a second i cant refuse him. 
fullstop

Friday, December 16, 2011

saya rindu awak .

mata masih terkebil-kebil tak percaya. is it really happen to me? it was like all of sudden. btw, im soo happy right now. mula-mula macam malas nak letak hope yang tinggi, takut tiba-tiba tak jadi , diri sendiri makan hati. everyday was like thursday. im waiting for it. tapi takpaa tabahkan hati juga. alhamdulillah, seriously he came to see me. i was like .... ? i really cant express how do i feel when i know that he is really coming. you know, he really sanggup to drive all over here. and he had to drive back to his college at night.  

i was like soo miss him so much. serious im swear. time jumpa dia, belum tengok lagi muka, i was fall in love with his perfumes. it was like so addicted . rasa macam nak peluk and said " awak tau betapa rindunya saya kat awak ". but i was like, nevermind. and there we go. we just had a movie together . actually the 1st movie we've been watched together since 3 years of dates. 

well, agak terkilan bila ada satu soalan dia refuse nak jawab. tapi takpaa. i wont force you.  bak kata Daniel, " dia yang menyeksa perasaan dia sendiri "  and " dia " in this statement just anggap its me. a good point there. i wish, i can tell you that " i miss you so much , sayang. " and im thinking of regreting what i've done to him. i just wish that i can have you back. 


picture was taken during Eid '10. so this is it. Meor Mohd Syazreen  (:

Sunday, December 11, 2011

fish and chip , melbourne .

hampir setiap hari membayangkan betapa sedapnya dapat makan fish and chip. and sampai sanggup singgah mahanttan fish market untuk try fich fillet. but tak sesedap fish and chip yang jauh nun kat aussie. serius i wish i can fly back there again, and eat as many as i can sampai mual pun tak kesah. dah berapa bulan memendam mengidam nak makan fish and chip made in aussie. 


so inilah tukang masak my favorite shop. serius totally sangat sedap. and this is the shop that only sell fish and chip. so insyallah halal makanannya. 

and, this is how the fish and chip looks like. of course tak laah sehebat decoration kat hotel or any place, tapi ikan tu not frozen, it is fresh . the fish dia celut dengan tepung baru goreng. tak macam kat sini, kalau nak just keluar dari peti sejuk and goreng. huh sungguh tak fresh. and sangatlaa tak kedekut. kalau oleh orang tu nak letak lagi banyak, tapi disebabkan kesempitan ruang , taklaa dia nak letak penuh. and guess what ? this fish and chip just cost about 7 dollar aussie . betapa berbaloi nyaa.

so this is where the shop located. berhadapan shop adalah laut . and this area is called rye pisle. so the photo was captured around 7 pm. and suhu cuaca dia. OMG ! walau pakai setebal mana, kesejukan tu menyerang sampai ke nerve. serius tak tipuu.

lastly, inilaa rupa shop dari luar. it looks simple. sebab major orang sini just take away, and dalam kedai pun tak provide banyak sangat meja makan. i'll go there suatu hari nanti, untuk menikmati fish and chip yang paling lazat pernah dirasai seumur hidup .
(:

-the end-

Thursday, December 8, 2011

MISTAKES ~

how stupid am i to let all this things happen?seriously rasa macam nak putar balik masa tak kesah laa guna any cara pun, even i'll begging to Doraemon minta tolong reverse back the time. and now taktau macam mana nak look foward ahead. segan malu adoii. totally it was my mistakes to let all this things berpanjangan. and tak tau macam mana nak berhadapan dengan dia, the situation. ? i'll erase it from my life. the feels toward you .

 shit ! maaf . 

Saturday, December 3, 2011

bila keadaan jadi huru hara

so seminggu macam katak bawah tempurung. segala berita ke gossip ke dapat tau dari mulut orang je. tu lah akibat dengan sengaja taknak bawa lappy pergi kolej. baru tau betapa bosannya hidup without it. boleh pulaa hati meronta-ronta nak on9 FB , blogging. well biasa laa tu bila hati nakkan sesuatu, mesti tak sabar-sabar. tapi bila ada depan mata , condition kau macam mana pun tak dikesahnya. macam manusia. serius teringat dulu time zaman couple-couple dulu. time nak tackle punya laa alamak aii gentlemen kott, tapi bila dah dapat, kau kau segala meluat nak tengok. haha manusia manusia.


penat kadang-kadang melayan karenah manusia yang kadang-kadang kita sendiri tak pernah faham. you know how excited am i to told you all the story that happened to me, but you gave me, silenced. it hurt me lots. disebabkan itu lah im just stood still and all my word macam disekat. serious my mood jatuh totally. 


it is better to keep my mouth shut !


so the next thing, perkara yang paling banyak yang boleh diperkatakan tapi paling banyak mengundang kesakitan dan segala yang bad laa. perasaan. serius hate to talk about my feels. well, even kawan-kawan texting, or even call, entahlaa seriously i really like to compare people with him. walau baik mana pun seorang manusia yang menghampiri, dia pasti akan jadi mangsa 'comparing'. then hati mulaa laa, " kau tgk perangai dia macam ni " si dia tu lebih baik dari ni tau, bllaaa blaaa blaa and blaaa.

well, my heart still backup dia sangat-sangat. and yet tak tipu. i do miss him so much. rasa macam nak drive pergi rumah dia or call dia . serious i cant stand anymore. 

masih ingat lagi waktu kat SABDA, standard sekolah yang mengharamkan cell phone. tapi ada je yang berani yang bawa. moment tu merupakan moment yang tak boleh dilupakan. terasa macam oh how sweet he was. initially, we just set up the time using public phone. kebetulan iqa bawa phone, and he ask me iqa punya phone number. tak sangka since that day, he call me almost everyday. so dengan rela hatinya dari tingatkan 3 turunlaa ground floor ke bilik iqa.



 kadang-kadang iqa terpaksa juga jerit dari bawah. kalau dah jerit tu, faham-faham jelaa. memang sangatlahh excited waktu tu. dah tu dapat cakap bukan nya sangat open, tapi kena sorok. nasib baik dorm iqa sporting. and perbualan pun seems to be controlled skit sebab terasa macam kat public. and yet, dia sanggup teman either dengan cara texting or calling me supaya dapat stay lebih lama untuk belajar. alangkah indah kalau selamanya kau begini. 


and last, im afraid to be left. afraid to accept anyone sebab maybe dah terbiasa hidup dengan dia. kalau nak accept, nanti mula laah hati hasut macam-macam. tapi memang betul pun. hati manusia kita tak boleh predict kan. hari ni kata suka. esok kata sayang. lusa kata benci . the next day kata cinta . hmm ? yea it really make sense kott. perasaan fobia untuk menerima sentiasa menyelubungi kerana perasaan ditinggalkan pasti menyusul. 


*entah apa aku merepek malam-malam buta. tapi ini ikhlas dari hati. dan sekarang hati berharap pada kemustahilan yang memang akan berlaku. sekian lama aku tunggu kau, kau datang juga akhirnya. tapi kau terlaluu takut untuk itu. sungguh aku tak sanggup nak tunggu lagi. jangan takut kerana aku tak terima kau. biar apa yang aku angankan selama ini dengan kau akan jadi kenyataan. 
 
-SEKIAN-